The duties.

This is a post for all you first timers. Take a deep breath. It's going to be ok.

Every bride will have different expectations of her bridal party, so if she does not initiate a meeting suggest to sit down and go over your duties. Wedding planning is very stressful and emotional, and sometimes brides won't always know what to ask of her bridesmaids. Here are some basic duties you can expect to carry out that I modified from this article from The Knot.

PRE-WEDDING

• Offer to help with prewedding tasks. Specific things you can volunteer to help with are shopping for her wedding dress, assembling invitations and favors.
  

• Scout out bridesmaid dresses, shoes, jewelry, and other accessories. Give the bride your measurements, and pay for the entire ensemble. Sometimes the bride will pay for your dress! Don't refuse!

• Plan, cohost, and pay for the shower and bachelorette party with other bridesmaids.

• Keep a record of all the gifts received at various parties and showers (so that the bride/couple can write thank-you notes); maintain RSVP lists.

• Attend the ceremony rehearsal and rehearsal dinner. (Keep abreast of all prewedding parties, and go to as many as possible.)

• Purchase a wedding present perhaps with one or several of the other bridesmaids. This provides more buying power, and two heads are better than one when it comes to gift ideas. Sometimes the entire bridesmaid troupe pitches in for one knock-her-socks-off wedding gift.

WEDDING DAY

• Pay to get your hair and make up done. Sometimes you can just use the vendor that the bride is using, or just do it yourself if the bride is not picky.
  

• Run last-minute errands. On the day of the wedding, be on hand to confirm flower delivery times, meet and greet the ceremony officiant.
  

• Stand in the receiving line at the bride's request.

• Serve as auxiliary hostess at the reception by introducing guests, making sure they know where the bar is located, and inviting them to sign the guest book.

• Give the maid/matron of honor a break by helping to carry the bride's train whenever necessary. Bustle the train before dancing begins, and be ready to help fix it if it comes unhooked. Accompany the bride on visits to the restroom, if asked.

OPTIONAL

• Offer to create a bridal emergency kit with make up remover, q-tips, stain remover and other things to get through accidents of the day.

• Offer to bring snacks for the bridal party to munch on in between the ceremony and reception.

• Hit the dance floor when the music kicks in. Dance with groomsmen during the formal first-dance sequence. Also, be on the lookout for toe-tapping guests who might need encouragement and/or a dance partner.

Most importantly, you are the emotional support for the bride. There are many times in life that are about you. This is not one of those times. Don't complain to the bride about the bridesmaid dresses, or about how expensive everything is. Unfortunately you just need to suck it up. You can do this. Many have survived, so can you.